Hey Christians! It's that time of year! Christmas is all up in our grill bringing on the joy of the season. Like a Sony Bravia 46-inch LCD HDTV priced UNDER a thousand dollars! That's 1080p, not 720p, yo. Let's just say "three wise men" were spotted doing the upgrade thang at Tar-jhay.
If you're looking to honor Our Savior's birth with exotic and lavish scents, then indulge in The One by Dolce & Gabbana for $55.99 (1.7 oz). Its unexpected hints of plum and vanilla pair seamlessly with the world's greatest unexpected pregnancy. Speaking of unexpected, don't make your guests crash in the gross manger thingy. Put down some coin for your peeps and let them rest their weary heads on a Natura Latex Harmony Mattress. This tree-hugging badboy blends soy-based and latex foams, helping reduce our dependence on uncool petro-chemicals. Petro-chemicals that come from Jesus' old stomping grounds. That is if the tankers can make it past those jerk pirates trolling the coast of Somalia! LOLz!
Which brings us back to Christmas. Don't be all procrastinatey and stuff this year! Jesus is checking Santa's list. You might not be on it. So CHARGE it!
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6 comments:
God, that's good.
I am born anew in your genius.
As a Christian a few sentences in here are a bit unpleasant for me to read, but I actually think you have a huge point and totally see where you're coming from.
I have to say this really kinda made me stop in my tracks and really look at what Christmas has become. And us Christian folk like to say 'Jesus is the reason for the season', but then we're out there hoofing it with everyone else standing around in long lines to spend hundreds and thousands of dollars on Sony Bravia 46-inch LCD HDTV's. And xBox's. Iphones and $50 t-shirts.
I'm thinking how cool would it be if we could get all the Christians to take all those billions of dollars one year and give it to a cause in the name of Jesus. You could feed an entire country I'll bet. Could provide water wells for hundreds of thousands of children that are drinking water out of muddy poopy cesspools.
Yeah, I'm just dreaming. (Or rather, just woke up at 3 in the morning thinking about it and can't sleep. Thanks Paul!)
But that would be CRAZZZZy. We need our stuff, right?
Jennifer, I am humbled by your words...
JenT, I agree with you 100%! Can you imagine the power of what we could do? Maybe some day.
Yea, it's hard to let go of our traditions. Jesus even said that our traditions can become so blinding that they can even replace the word of God (Mark 7). Christmas seems to be more about "mass" than "Christ" in today's american culture. One thing we're doing to bring back the focus, is not to buy individual gifts for the family at all. For the past 2 years, (this being #3) we go out for dinner together and then go see a Christmas movie. This year will be A Christmas Carol. We really enjoy the time and don't miss the stuff at all and the memories last way longer.
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